Pre-recorded Messages

I am going to rant today on the pre-recorded messages that seem to take up the better part of my day anymore. I can't seem to be able to call anywhere anymore without having to push 1 for this or 2 for that. Some days I just want to start pushing buttons as soon as I hear the phone on the other end start to ring.
The other day I had to push 1 if I needed English. (Why don't they just assume that I need English and ask the other guys to push 1 if they need another language?)
I then had to push 1 if I was a customer and 2 if I wasn't. (I can't figure out why I would call if I wasn't a customer. Are there really people out there just calling these numbers for the heck of it?)
The next prompt wanted to know what I needed with this department. If I didn't say exactly something that they wanted to hear, the recording told me that they didn't understand what I was trying to say and maybe I meant something else which she proceeded to give me about six different options, which none applied to my problem. She even did a "hum" while trying to figure out what exactly that I wanted to do.
I started screaming into the phone and at the end of my tirade a very polite voice - still a recording said, "I'm sorry, I did not understand what you said."
This prompted me to start choking the phone and saying some words that were not the best ones in the world.
At this time, I started to just push the "0" button to try to get a live person on the other end of the phone. Everytime that I pushed this a recording would tell me that this was not a correct response. After about the sixth time of trying to get an operator on the phone, the sweet voice came on to tell me that I would have to try my call later and proceeded to disconnect.
Obviously I was not needing the service of this company after all. Who cares if I now have a curling iron caught in my hair or not? I will just put a bow on it and tell everyone that it is a new style.